Unitended Dreams
by K0nflicti0n
Summary: A deep cover assignment for Kensi and Deeks has unexpected and serious consequences that will change everything. Will it be for the better or for worse?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I am using this story to replace Tequila and a Sombrero. Maybe I'll go back and revisit the original concept at a later date but this idea is for more appealing to me and hopefully to you guys as well.**

Sasha and Nick Michaels stood in the middle of a group of well-armed and rather disciplined guards in full tactical load out as they were escorted deeper into one of the many warehouses deep in the heart of the Los Angeles shipping yard. They didn't panic because they had expected this very thing to happen when they arrived for the meeting, what the hadn't expected was for their communication equipment to lose all signal the moment they stepped into the building so they had discreetly, and expertly, removed and disposed of their earwigs before they could be found. Of course not having any contact with the rest of the team set Deeks and Kensi on edge but that was just the nature of undercover work. Especially when it was a let minute meet set up by the very man they were investigating.

It wasn't the first time the two partners had been sent undercover as man and wife, it was however the first time everything felt wrong and like a set up to the more season LAPD Detective. Sure the bad guy always brought muscle with them to a meeting like this, but they had never expected said bad guy to bring enough guys and guns to take over and entire city block. But being the professionals they were the two investigators continued on with their cover identities as if this was business as usual.

"Ah! Mr. and Mrs. Michaels." A man said as he walked towards them flanked by two men in rather expensive custom tailored suits and two more men similar to the six men escorting Kensi and Deeks. Combine these eight with the dozen guards they had seen and Kensi and Deeks both knew that if things went south Sam and Callen would have no chance of getting to them in time.

"And you must be the secretive Mr. White." Deeks said as he and Kensi came to a stop. They were both dressed in typical business attire, which was very different from their usual clothes. "Well now that we are face to face are you going to tell us your real name?"

"Sadly no. Such precautions are a must for a man in my business." Mr. White said as he stepped forward and walked in a large circle around the men guarding Kensi and Deeks, when in reality their automatic weapons were aimed at the OSP members backs ready to gun them down if the order was given. "I have avoided your countries many federal agencies for a very long by using such security measure."

"Well with all due respect Mr. White if you can't trust us with something as simple as a name how are we to trust you to honor any arrangement we make with you?" Kensi asked as she noticed that Mr. White was actually looking to see if anyone had followed her and Deeks to the meeting.

"You can't." White said with a grin as he looked directly at Kensi with a cocky grin on his face. "Trust is a commodity that is earned through actions, not words. I trusted the two of you to come to this meeting alone and you have. So I shall give you a small amount of trust in return." Mr. White said as he eyed Kensi up and down before he noticed the heated look in Nick Michaels, a.k.a. Marty Deeks, eyes. "Forgive me Mr. Michaels. I do not mean to stare at your wife so. But it is so hard to resist admiring her. Especially her eyes. I have never seen anything so unique and they only enhance her beauty." The mysterious Mr. White said with a apologetic tone of voice and a hand motion.

"Yes she really is beautiful." Deeks said as he looked at her and for a moment Kensi couldn't tell if he was in character or if this was the real Deeks talking to her so she simply turned her head to look at him and smiled. "However she is my wife and I would take and advances on her extremely personal."

"As any man should when it comes to matters of the heart." Mr. White said as if he had forgotten the fact that he had been looking at Kensi with lust filled eyes only seconds ago. "Now, shall we proceed with our first transaction? And hopefully the start of a most lucrative arrangement for all parties involved." Mr. White nodded at the two guards who had escorted him before the simply turned on their heels, in a precise military manner, and walked out of sight.

"But first a show of good faith. You have already handed over your weapons to my men before entering the building, but that was merely a security precaution." White said as he stood back in his original position between his two well-dressed lackeys. "I will give you a showing of good faith but I require one from the both of you to….prove that you truly are husband and wife and not a pair of undercover agents."

Deeks let out a nervous half laugh as he grinned and shook his head, missing his untamed hair he had been forced to trade in for the slightly longer than average 'professional' haircut needed for this assignment. "You already know we are Federal Agents. It wouldn't make a whole lot of sense for a pair of I.C.E. agents to pose as a a married and crocked pair of Customs Agents."

Suddenly the civil and friendly demeanor on Mr. Whites face faded and was replaced with a serious and very deadly professionalism. "Not to you perhaps but to me." Suddenly the air filled with the sound of weapons being raised as they were pointed at Kensi and Deeks. "It would make perfect sense."

"And just how are we supposed to prove that we are husband and wife? I'm sure you have run our backgrounds and know as much about us as you can." Kensi said trying to get things back under control before they were both gunned down.

"Papers, names and backgrounds can all be forged and falsified Sasha." Mr. White said while maintaining his hardened expression. "But the tenderness between a man and woman in the most intimate of setting cannot be faked. No matter had trained and discipline one is."

"Whoa! If you are saying what I think you are then forget it." Deeks spoke up outraged as he stepped forward. "It's one thing to ogle my wife but its another to suggest what I think you are."

"And yet it is something that must be done Agent Michaels." Mr. White said as he stepped forward and glared deep into Deeks eyes. "I can tell you care a great deal for her, as any husband should. But this is not a request, either the two of you prove you are what you claim to be. Or my men gun you both down here and now."

Deeks mind was racing as he tried to think of a way out of this situation and he knew that it west impossible. If they didn't do as Mr. White was telling them Deeks had no doubt that he and Kensi would be murdered before they even had a chance to flinch, and there were far too many guards to try and fight their way out of here. Suddenly the soft touch of Kensi's hand on his shoulder and the light reflecting of the wedding ring on her finger caught his attention.

"Nick….we don't have any other option here." Kensi said softly as she looked up at Deeks before she pulled him down into a kiss, a rather tender and passionate kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

It was the day after Mr. White had made Kensi and Deeks prove that their undercover marriage was real and not simply a cover story of two federal agents trying to arrest him and Deeks couldn't bring himself to look at Kensi. He knew she chose to do what needed to be done in order to maintain their cover and save their lives but the target of their investigation hadn't been content or convinced with the first performance and he had order them to do it again, and then a third time. At first Deeks had done everything he could to try and stop it from happening, he really did, but it was no use. So he had done everything he could to be a tender and gentle with Kensi as possible, even going as far as completely covering her body with his to keep White and a couple of his goons from having a full biblical view of Kensi.

But it had been in vain as the second time they had to prove they were married he order Kensi to be on top of Deeks so that she was in full view of them and then the second time he had literately put a gun to Deeks head and told him to take Kensi from behind. Never before had Deeks wanted to kill anyone as much as he had wanted to kill the so called Mr. White for making them, him, do this. Yes Deeks had often wondered and even dreamed about being with Kensi like this. But not at the risk of their lives, or in front of four armed men who were ready to kill them. Over the years the two partners had slowly morphed into best friends and during that time Deeks had begun to develop feelings for his incredibly attractive partner, feelings he tried to stop by dating a countless line of woman who had nothing in common with the mismatched brown eyed female other than being incredibly beautiful. But nothing worked, no matter the woman's hair color (he refused to date a brunette), eye color (brown eyes were out of the question as well), or personality (strong and independent was a no go as well) he found himself constantly comparing these woman to one Kensi Marie Blye.

But now after what Mr. White had forced the two of them to do Deeks couldn't look in a mirror or at Kensi and not feel disgusted with himself. Deeks could see Kensi's walls coming up as soon as they separated for the third, and thankfully final, time. Sure she put up a good show as the loving, scared, and concerned wife but that was part of her cover. Deeks knew Kensi, and now he truly did know every aspect of her, and could see in her eyes that the walls he had worked to hard to get around and through had instantly put but back into place and were stronger than ever and any chance he once had of the two of them being together for real had just been crushed. Even after all of this what hurt the most is the guarded awkwardness that hung in the air between to two partners.

When they had returned to their cover house Deeks had tried to talk to Kensi, to tell her he was sorry but she had shut him out with a simple 'taking a shower'. Deeks could understand the sentiment since he was covered in dried sweat and smelled of sex, and any other day he would have made a joke about joining her but what he had been forced to do combined with the almost venomous distain in Kensi voice had stopped him and he simply nodded before he moved to sit on the couch. After Kensi had finished her shower Deeks moved to take his own but found that Kensi had used all of the hot water so he simply changed his clothes and walked towards the living room. When Deeks went to sit on the couch, making sure to be as far from Kensi as he could, his partner simply stood up and walked towards the bedroom and closed the door behind her and she had remained there the rest of the day and all of the night, and while he couldn't be sure Deeks thought he had heard her crying but he couldn't bring himself to check on her because he knew that she was crying because of him.

After a very long and sleepless night on the couch Deeks was sitting in the exact same spot her had been last night when Kensi finally walked out of the bedroom fully dressed and from the tension in her shoulders and the set of her Jaw Deeks knew he should do anything but try to talk to her, only his self-loathing prevented him from remaining silent.

"Kensi I…"

"No." Kensi said firmly and she refused to look at him.

"Look I just want to…."

"I don't care what you want Deeks. I chose to do what needed to be done to keep us alive and for the mission. Nothing more." Kensi shot back still keeping her back to him as she set about making a pot of coffee.

"And I get that, really I do I just wanted to…" Deeks tried again before he was cut off, only this time Kensi looked at him. Or rather glared at him like she wanted to shoot him.

"I don't care what you want to say to clear your conscious! I did what needed to be done because you were too scared to and almost got us killed!" Kensi had never spoken to Deeks like this before, not even during the early days of their partnership. "It's done and over with so leave it alone."

Deeks sat there, still wearing the cheap off the rack suit, for several long seconds before he finally stood up, when he did so he couldn't help but noticed that Kensi took a step back even though he was more than ten feet away from her. At that moment Deeks knew that every ounce of trust and respect the two had worked so hard to build between them was gone so he wordlessly he turned towards the bathroom to take the shower he had skipped yesterday. After Deeks had showered and changed his clothes he walked into the living room and noticed that Kensi was still standing in the kitchen, only know she once against had her back towards the living room and was staring out the window into the backyard as still as a board.

Feeling even more fatigued from a sleepless night after his shower Dees wanted coffee but he knew if he tried to approach Kensi to get a cup she would move to a different part of the house or lock herself in the bedroom again so he simply grabbed his wallet and proceeded towards the front door of the house. "Coffee." Was the only word he muttered, not even caring if Kensi heard him or not before he walked out.


	3. Chapter 3

When Deeks walked out of the house he was sharing with Kensi for this operation she had expected him to slap the door in anger but the almost reverent way he closed to door shook Kensi far more than if he had acted as she expected him to. Kensi had a pretty good idea and understanding of how Deeks felt about the situation but whatever Deeks was feeling Kensi knew it was nothing compared to how she felt at. Never before in her life had Kensi felt so dirty and used as she did in that moment. The first time they had been forced to have sex Kensi would forever be grateful for how Deeks handled the situation and the extra care he took to cover her body with his to try and preserve some form of her modesty was something Kensi had been grateful for. But when White forced them to become intimate a second time and ordered Kensi to straddle Deeks she knew that they had lost complete and utter control of not only the operation but the situation they were in and for a split second between the first and sex time they had sex Kensi wondered if they wouldn't simply kill Deeks before subjecting her to a much worse fate.

But what had made it worse for Kensi was that this time she had reached a climax around the same time as Deeks had and in made her feel dirty in a manner that an extremely long and very hot shower had not been able to wash away, no matter how hard she had scrubbed herself all over. Kensi was ashamed of herself, more than she had ever been in her entire life. If she had been on that operation with anyone other than Deeks she would have tried to talk or fight her way out of what Mr. White had forced them to do. But the thought of getting Deeks killed because of her actions, or lack thereof in this particular case, scared her. They had grown to rely on each other so much that they were almost co-dependent. And yes before yesterday's event Kensi had been attracted to Deeks and not just in a physical manner. But not she couldn't look at him and not regret everything that had happened because she, not Deeks, had been the one to agree with it. In typical Deeks fashion he had been a professional and a gentleman with her and had tried to prevent everything from happening. And she had been too weak to try and stop it.

Even with all of that the worst part of the entire event was that White's so called show of good faith was nothing more than four cases of hand guns that had no serial numbers. The sick bastard had forced them to put on a sex show for his own enjoyment just to be given the information about a case of untraceable handguns they had to ensure made it freely and without incident through customs, he was playing with them and Kensi was genuinely afraid of what who might try to force them to do next time, if he didn't just have his men kill the two partners.

While Kensi was in their cover house thinking about and regretting everything White had done to them and how she had snapped at her partner, Deeks was mindlessly walking down the sidewalk a mere shadow of the man he had been 24 hours ago. No longer did Deeks eyes have the playful and lively spark in them, the crocked smile was gone. Deeks now had a thousand yard stare in his eyes and his face was complete devoid of any and all emotion. As Deeks continued to walk each step seemed only to remind me of each second of his forced intimacy with Kensi and the fact that when she had looked into his eyes as he entered her the first time it would have been impossible to not see the fear and hurt the shone brightly in her mismatched brown eyes and he knew that it wasn't the fear of being killed that was in her eyes. It was the fear of what he was about to do, and Deeks couldn't stomach that fact. Which is why he suddenly ducked down an ally and bend over beside a dumpster and began to violently vomit. As he stood their throwing up until he was only dry heaving Deeks could hear the muttered voices but he didn't care what they said or thought about him, because it was nothing compared to the monster he believed he had turned into. The kind of monster that instead of fighting for his partner simply gave in to what an international criminal told him to do, and his own carnal desires. He knew that when this case was over he and Kensi could never work together again. If Sam and Callen found out what he had done to her they might very well kill him, and right now he was more than willingly to let them do just that.

**OFFICE OF SPECIAL PROJECTS**

As Eric was going over all the information they had on the semi mysterious international arms dealer who simply called himself Mr. White when a alert popped up on his screen. At first Eric looked at the high priority information dumbfound for a couple of seconds before he sighed and reached over to the phone on his desk.

"Hetty its Eric. You need to come see this." Was all Eric said before Hetty informed him she would be right up. After Eric hung up the phone he looked at the screen and grew fairly frustrated. All his and Nell's hard work had just been flushed down the drain.


	4. Chapter 4

Hetty stood their looking just over Eric's shoulder at the computer screen before them. "If this confirmed Mr. Beale?" Hetty asked as she did not fully trust the information that was clearly displayed.

"I've double checked the source and it's been verified by both the FBI and Homeland." Eric said in a defeated tone as he looked back at his boss

"Very well than Mr. Beale. Contact our people and tell them that they can come home. With Mr. White no longer among the living this operation is over." Hetty said calmly as she walked out of Ops leaving Eric to his task.

Kensi was sitting at the table in the dining room of the cover house holding a cup of coffee in her hands and she was trying to work out how she was going to apologize to Deeks. She knew that this whole situation was doing a number on both of them and that was exactly what Mr. White wanted to see if they really were married or if this would cause them to slip up and reveal cracks in their cover, and of course it also showed them that he was in complete control of the situation. As much as she wanted to be mad at Deeks deep down Kensi knew that should couldn't. The hardest part about all of this was thing between them had been great. In fact they had openly addressed their attraction to each other the night before their meeting with White and when they had woken up, fully clothed, in bed that morning there had been no jokes, innuendos or rapid disconnection between them. That morning had started with a shared smile and good morning. But even with all that Kensi could clearly recall Deeks telling her, not her cover, that he loved her before he had reluctantly entered her the first time.

To White and his men it was a man telling his wife he loved her to help alleviate her fears But Kensi say the look in his eyes and that tone of voice that he used when he was being completely honest and open with her, and it scared her. The last time a man had told her he loved her left Kensi in the middle of the night leaving her to wake up alone and confused on Christmas morning. She knew that Deeks was not Jack and that he would never leave her like that unless she pushed him away, which is what she was doing right now before her emotions were all over the place. Scared, happy, angry (because dogs go mad not people) hopeful, insecure, confused, shocked. Just so many emotions running the gambit at once was so mentally exhausting that Kensi didn't even realize her cover cell was ringing until it beeped letting her know she had missed a call and then the land line for the house started ringing and this time Kensi did answer the phone.

"Michaels residence." Kensi said forcing her voice to sound alert and welcoming even though she felt anything but that.

"Hey it's Eric. Is everything ok? I tried to call your cell." Eric sounded slightly worried but he knew that Deeks wouldn't let anything happen to Kensi.

"Yeah sorry I was in the….uh bathroom."

"Oh… uh… Well Hetty wanted me to call you guys and tell you the op is over."

It was such a simple statement but with Hetty's reputation for knowing more than she really should Kensi couldn't help but wonder if she was pulling the plug because of what had happened yesterday, even though they weren't supposed to check in until tomorrow.

"Did…uh Did she say why?" As Kensi asked she regretted it because of how weak her voice sounded to her and she couldn't help but wrap her free arm around herself in a self-comforting manner. Having Deeks, White, and his mean knowing what had happened was bad enough but to have her boss and potentially the rest of the team know was like a nightmare come to life.

"Seems The FBI was tracking White as well and when they tried to arrest him last night it end in a shootout. White and his top two guys were killed. Investigation is over so Hetty says you guys can come on back." Eric said in a manner of fact tone of voice but Kensi could tell something was bothering him and as much as she wanted to be a friend to him right now she had to much of her own shit to deal with, all of it centered around her and Deeks.

"Oh…." Kensi said and she was actually glad that White was dead. Sure there were times she had been relieved when a suspect was killed because of what they were planning or because of how twisted they were. But this was the first time Kensi was actually glad that another human being was dead, and that scared her. "When Deeks gets back I'll tell him." As soon as the words were out of her mouth the bit her lower lip and regretted that little slip.

"Back from where?" Eric asked just making conversation at this point.

"Oh…We needed some things from the store and…..Well I needed a break from Deeks so I sent him to go get them." Kensi said hoping the lie would convince the usually gullible Technical Operator.

"Oh. Well I'll tell Hetty you guys will out of the house sometime today." Eric said as he hung up.

Kensi just sat there letting the news soak in and what it meant for her and Deeks and their future as partners because right now Kensi didn't know if they could, or would want to, go forward as anything else. If Kensi was perfectly honest she wasn't even sure if her and Deeks could work together anymore after with White had forced them do and how easily she had given up.

Kensi just sat there waiting for Deeks to come back and she was starting to get worried because for a simple coffee run Deeks had been gone for two hours. It wasn't that Kensi thought Deeks couldn't look after himself, it was Deeks habit of trying to keep the weight of the world on his shoulders until it became too much for him. Finally the sound of a key sliding into the lock of the door filled the eerily silent house and the door opened. And when Kensi saw Deeks a small gasp escaped her lips.


	5. AUTHOR UPDATE NOT A CHAPTER

**UPDATE ON ME: Ok so here's the thing. I'm currently in the process of getting back into shape to go back into the military. So that means I am in the gym twice a day PLUS work and life and other things so I don't have a whole lot of free time. That being said I have not given up on writing. I will update all my active stories over the weekend, most likely Sunday because at the pace I have been going I think I am going to need a day off lol.**


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